We kicked off the 16 Days Campaign
against Gender Violence with a community cafe at a residential
complex in Alwarpet, Chennai on November 25. Residents in the complex gathered in the community hall to discuss the theme of bystander intervention and violence. How does one respond when
one becomes aware that a friend, a relative, a colleague, a neighbour
or even a stranger on the street is a victim of violence of some
kind? Should one intervene? What kind of steps can one take?
The discussion kicked off with the
question, “What brought you here?” One resident narrated that her
maid came in with bruises on her face that morning and she was unsure
how to help her. “How do we empower them?.... They don't have
financial security and they need protection from other men as
well..... A husband in name is needed to at least ward off unwanted
attention is the sentiment of some of these women...even if we try to help, the next day, they go back to their husband and you feel so stupid...” -- these were
some of the thoughts that were voiced.
A young resident noted that it happens
in every strata of society and it is easy to remove ourselves and
pretend. The moderator , Anupama (of Prajnya), noted that taking small steps such as
indicating that you are willing to listen, giving a helpline number,
ringing the door bell (www.bellbajao.org) are also bystander
intervention. Residents also narrated incidents where they did
intervene in various ways on someone's behalf. During the discussion, residents also were very frank on why many hesitate to intervene – fear of
personal safety, doubt on whether we can help, crossing personal
spaces.
Residents were given helpline numbers of organizations within the city, as well as the police helpline number. The discussion concluded with one of the residents' comment, "we can take small steps to help even if we are unsure of how it turn out in the long run."
Residents found the discussion very compelling and continued to voice their thoughts in small groups. We hope this conversation continues!
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